Back in Cowboy Country

18 June 2010 - Kicking back at home in Lakeside:

Caryl, Dylan, and Sarah watch while Ed rocks on Guitar Hero!
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After 5 wonderful days at home in Pinetop-Lakeside, Ed and I headed back to Wyoming yesterday. Due to various errands I had to run before we left, we didn’t get on the road until after 10:00 a.m. It was about 1:00 this morning when Ed and I arrived back at the Cheyenne apartment, and it was after 2:00 a.m. when we finally went to sleep. Needless to say, I am very tired today!
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Somehow this drive seemed even longer than the last one. It was especially hard on poor Caryl, my 75-year-old mother-in-law. She handled the drive to Arizona pretty well, but the return trip really wore on her.
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Crossing the border from New Mexico into “Colorful Colorado.”
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It was a tough decision, but we decided to allow Dylan to stay at home with Sarah and Jacob this week, rather than making him come to Wyoming with us again. He’d handled his first week here well, but the second week was tough on him. He was growing quite homesick for his siblings and his dog, which made him cranky.
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Since we’ll only be gone for 4 days this time, it’s a good test of how well my children can get along in our absence! Still, I must say it feels mighty odd to be here without my youngest child. The apartment feels strangely empty with just Ed and me.
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Crossing from Colorado into Wyoming about 10 miles from Caryl’s Colorado house.

Since it was dark when we arrived last night, I shot this picture today.
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Ed spent today fine-tuning the truck (new fuel injectors, new brakes, and new temperature gauge) and driving his mom to do errands in nearby Fort Collins. Tonight we got started on packing up the apartment, getting everything ready to load into a big trailer that his bishop offered to loan us for our move.
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We hope to have everything loaded and ready to go by tomorrow night so we can get a good night’s sleep and then head back toward home early Thursday morning.
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By the way, yesterday was Ed’s and my first anniversary. First month, that is. And they said it wouldn’t last!

Where Home Is

"Home is where the heart is."

We've all heard the old saying, and I've always believed it.  Now, though, I feel it.

Ed with one of his best friends, Kelcey.  12 June 2010

I'm a real homebody.  I love to travel, but in the end where I really want to be is here in my own house with my three adored children.  That has always been true for me.  At least, it was true until I fell in love with a certain man and married him, then put him on a plane for Wyoming.

The four days I spent here without Ed didn't feel like home at all.  The yearning in my heart was to be in Cheyenne.  No, that's not right.  My yearning was to be with Ed, wherever that might be.  I didn't even know it was possible to feel like this!

Ed pulls the bad engine out of his truck.

While I was in Wyoming with Ed, I spent 17 days away from my two oldest children, Sarah and Jacob.  That was a first for all of us, and I missed them like crazy.  Still, I knew my place was with my husband.  Cheyenne was home for a time.

Dylan assists with lifting the engine.

There was plenty of work to be done before we could return to Arizona.  Ed spent the first week tying up loose ends and completing jobs he'd promised to people in his community and church.  During the second week he had to pull a burned-out engine from his truck and put in a rebuilt engine.  Dylan provided some assistance, but it was a huge job.

Living and dining area in trailer.

My job during that second week was cleaning and prepping Ed's fifth-wheel trailer for the trip.  In order to be able to haul the trailer to its new home in Arizona, Ed had to have the truck up and running, so he worked at it almost nonstop.

The trailer's little kitchen.

Ed's mom, Caryl, came to Arizona with us to check out the area.  We're hoping she'll decide to move here to be near us.  She loved the retirement apartments we toured and she's enjoying our mild weather, beautiful scenery, and friendly people, so we're hopeful!  Meanwhile, she's staying in the fifth-wheel trailer parked in the driveway.

Geoffrey and Meghann have their first dance as Mr. and Mrs.

The youngest son of Ed's good friend, Kelcey, got married and had his wedding reception on June 12th.  We knew we had to stay in town at least that long in order to attend the festivities.  It was a lovely reception, but I remember looking around and then hugging Ed and whispering, "I don't need all this to feel married.  I just want to be with you."

The truck and trailer finally ready for the road.

We had hoped to be on the road by Monday morning, but last minute problems with the new engine forced us to stay in town until Tuesday morning.  We toyed with the idea of leaving late Monday and driving all night, but we weren't ready to go until almost midnight and we were all simply too tired by then.  We spent the night at Caryl's home in northern Colorado and left at 7:45 a.m.

I followed Ed all the way to Arizona.  This was the view ahead of me for almost 16 hours!

It was a very long drive!  It was 10:30 p.m. Arizona time when we finally pulled into the driveway of our White Mountain home!  That's 11:30 p.m Wyoming time, so we were on the road for almost 16 hours.  It's normally a 12-hour drive, but hauling a heavy trailer slows things up a lot. 

The snow-capped Rocky mountains provided gorgeous scenery through most of Colorado.

Our family will be vacationing in those mountains come July!

It was fun and exciting to call Cheyenne home for a while.  I loved seeing what Ed's life was like and meeting his friends and living in his apartment.  Yet being home with him here in my world, with my children within arm's reach, is even sweeter.  He says the White Mountains already feel more like home to him than Wyoming.

The sun sets as we near the western border of New Mexico.  Home is just 3 hours away! 

I dread the long, long drive back to Wyoming next week.  I guess I could wait here for 4 more days while Ed drives his mom back home and packs up his apartment.

Who am I kidding?  When Ed drives away, my heart drives away with him.  Where he is, there my home is.  I'll be in Wyoming next week.

Never Say "Schuster"

The following is a public service announcement.

For the public’s safety and protection, it is imperative that all citizens understand that there are some words that must NOT be used to elicit a smile from persons posing for photographs. Repeat: there are some words that must NEVER be uttered by persons posing for photographs.

Try not to be frightened upon viewing the photograph displayed below. The well-meaning but misguided photographer decided to depart from the traditional wisdom of asking the posees to mouth such words as, “cheese,” “money,” or “my dad has stinky feet.” Please note that each of these words and phrases end with the long “ee” sound, thus arranging the mouth into something approximating a smiling position.

No, this unwise photographer thought it might be more fun to ask the posees—two young females attending a baseball game in late April—to speak the name of a young, popular, attractive (aka “hot”) male character from the young ladies’ favorite television series, Glee, thus personalizing the shot.

The resulting photograph is, to say the least, shocking. View it at your own peril.

Sarah and Emmi. Enough said.

You were warned. Never, never say, “Schuster.”

Once Upon a Time

14 May 2010: Mary and Ed a few hours after their first meeting.

Once upon a time, two people fell in love and with their children became a family.

In my post on April 10, I wrote about my latest attempt at online dating.  After quite a few less-than-ideal experiences, I wrote that I had finally "met" some nice men.  Click here to go to that post:

            http://melethwensmemories.blogspot.com/2010/04/romantic-profiling.html 

In fact, at that time I was corresponding with a few interesting men, including one I had met on April Fool's Day. While the other men dropped away one by one, this particular man stayed with me. We agreed to go slowly, taking time to really get to know each other as we built a tentative relationship.

Just a few days after we began writing, this man took a 2-week trip to visit friends in Portland, Oregon. He sort of took me along, writing to me every night and sharing his experiences with me. I began to get a feel for the person he is and the things that are important to him.

Soon we were sharing our life stories, the good, the bad, and the ugly. We held nothing back, and I quickly found myself feeling close to him. As a writer, I understand how easy it is to connect with someone via the written word, but I was amazed that I could feel I'd known and cared about him for years when we'd never met in person.

Ed meets Mary’s family on May 14: Sarah, Ed, Mary, Jacob, and Dylan.

This man was Ed, of course. It took only 3 weeks for both of us to recognize that something special was happening. On April 23 we graduated from messages sent through the singles website to exchanging our home emails. Now we could send pictures to each other, but that still wasn't enough. On April 24 we moved on to nightly phone calls. That first night I was so nervous my stomach was turning somersaults, but within moments of hearing his deep voice I knew this was a man with whom I could truly be myself.

We stop by Karla’s house to visit before heading to the white Mountains.

(Left-to-right: Celesta, Gabrielle, Addison, Karla, Julien, and Elyssa.)

Originally, Ed and I had planned to meet in July at Estes Park, Colorado, where, long before I knew Ed even existed, I'd reserved a condo for our 2010 family vacation. Coincidentally, Estes Park is located less than a 2-hour drive from Ed's home in Cheyenne, Wyoming. We both thought we might be ready to meet by then. It was 3 months away and seemed like a safe plan.

However, after only two nights of telephone conversations, we knew we wouldn’t be able to wait that long to meet. The next day we checked our calendars and decided on a weekend that was workable for both of us, and before I knew it Ed had roundtrip plane tickets to Arizona for May 14-17, just 18 days away.

Mary and Ed after breakfast the next morning.

(Jacob made us homemade biscuits and gravy with hash browns.)

It was the longest 18 days in history. We spoke on the phone every night, usually for 5 or 6 hours. It was often 2:00 a.m. or later when we hung up because neither of us wanted to say good-night. There was always so much to share, and the only time we didn’t miss each other was when we were on the phone together, so we hated to break the connection. Ed often asked, “How can I miss you like this when I haven’t even met you?”

On Saturday morning, Ed plays ball with Dylan in the street.

During the days, Ed would send me sweet emails, both at school and at home. It was hard to focus on anything else when I was continually checking for his latest email! Soon even our nightly phone calls weren’t enough, so we would call each other once or twice throughout the evening after I was home from work. During the final week before his visit, he would call first thing in the morning and wake me so we could talk before I got ready for work.

By the time Ed came to Arizona, I was exhausted!

Lunch at China Wok buffet on Saturday afternoon.

I meant to blog Ed’s visit. He told me he was fine with being featured on my blog, and I took lots of pictures. What I hadn’t planned on was spending every second together except for the few hours we slept each night (still exhausted). Or Ed extending his visit twice. Or realizing we really didn’t want to be apart ever again and getting married one week after his arrival and four days before he returned to Wyoming.

Ed takes Jacob and Dylan to ride the go-carts.

Long before Ed and I finally met in person, we both knew we were in love and wanted to be married for eternity. Still, Ed wanted us to wait until we were together to express our feelings for each other. A lot of our phone conversations ended with vague phrases like, “You know what I want to say” or “I…I…I…like you so much!”

On Friday, the night of his arrival, Ed told me he loved me, and I was thrilled to finally be able to say the same to him. On Saturday night we went out for a romantic dinner at Chalet.  After we returned home Ed proposed, and I gladly accepted. On Sunday we attended church together. On Monday we chose my engagement ring and ordered our wedding bands, and we set our wedding date for June 24th. All in all, our first weekend together was so wonderful we didn’t want it to end.

Ed and Mary at Dylan’s ballgame on Monday night.

(Notice the shiny new engagement ring!)

Then Jacob asked Ed to stay for his graduation on Thursday, May 20. Dylan wanted Ed to attend more of his ballgames to cheer him on, as well as continue to practice pitching, batting and throwing with him at home. In the end, Ed moved his home flight back to Tuesday, May 25.

The rest, as they say, is history. Ed fit into our family so seamlessly that neither the kids nor I could imagine going back to life without him. They enjoyed his company and he was genuinely interested in them. I couldn’t bear the idea of being separated from him for several more weeks, and Ed himself felt his life was now in Arizona rather than Wyoming. Given the great distance between our homes, suddenly it made more sense to be married right away instead of waiting.

That’s our story. And it all ends with “They lived happily ever after.”

Wyoming Days

Dylan spends hours gleefully riding his rip-stik on the sidewalks around the apartment.

(There are no sidewalks in our Lakeside neighborhood!)

Today was the sixth day of our stay in Wyoming, and it was the first time we were able to slow down and relax, spending most of the day in our Cheyenne apartment. Ed had to have a tooth pulled this morning, and the dentist warned him not to exert himself all day, while the bleeding stopped.

Now I know why Ed’s friends laugh when he refers to himself as “retired.” He is indeed a retired mechanic, but his schedule is very full. Every morning we get up with the alarm and quickly prepare to leave the apartment for a variety of activities.

Most mornings begin with a drive to Ed’s mom’s house, across the border in Colorado just 30 minutes away. He helps her keep up with her big house on 2 acres by hauling and cutting wood for her furnace, trimming and mowing the acreage, and making various repairs, among many other projects.  He also drives her to the store, the doctor's office, and other appointments.

Dylan works on whacking down weeds around the shop.

The time we spend at Caryl’s house is a blessing for both Dylan and me. Ed has taken Dylan under his wing, teaching him how to do repair work and paying him to assist with chores. The two of them have really bonded, and Dylan is blossoming from both the attention and the responsibility.

Dylan loves mowing the acreage on the rider mower.

Ed also allowed him to drive a car around the back roads. E-gads!

As for me, I take along projects I’ve neglected far too long, having been rather distracted by our unexpected and happily time-consuming romance. While I work my way through these projects, I also have hours to visit with my new mother-in-law, and we already feel like old friends. Caryl has told me twice that she feels like we’ve known each other forever. Maybe we have, in the spiritual sense!

Trying out Ed’s Remington Varmint Rifle was one of Dylan’s greatest thrills!

(Ed is former military—Air Force—and is also very much into hunting.)

It seems that everyday Ed gets a call from someone asking him to work on their car or chainsaw or some other piece of equipment. Or they ask him to pick up parts and supplies or drop off items for repair. He doesn’t have the heart to tell anyone no, which only makes me love him more.

Still, I worry that we’ll never get to the tasks we must undertake in order to close up the apartment and move Ed to Lakeside in the few weeks we have left. He assures me that it will all work out just fine. Meanwhile, a few people have hinted to me that the folks of Cheyenne are going to experience a great loss when I take Ed away to Arizona!

On Tuesday night Ed grilled steaks for us. Yum!

Finally, we’ve enjoyed visiting with some of Ed’s friends in the evenings. I love getting to know the people who are important to him and seeing how much they care about him. Thankfully, they’ve all been very welcoming to me. I think our mutual happiness is clear to everyone, which helps ease worries that we rushed into marriage too soon.

On Wednesday, Ed took Dylan to Scouts with him. Dylan had a great time!

So far, we have yet to actually start on any activities related to the move itself. However, Ed is working through the other tasks that must be accomplished before we can start packing and loading up. I expect that packing is how we’ll be spending our time next week.  At least, that's what I'm hoping for!

A Memorable Memorial Day

The newlyweds, Ed and Mary, pose on the balcony of Old Bedlam.

Who would have thought a month ago that I would be married and spending Memorial Day in Wyoming with my new husband and mother-in-law? Not me, that’s for sure!

Ed and Caryl chat with a park worker about the fort’s history.

Ed’s mom, Caryl, wanted to do something memorable for Dylan and me while we were in town, so she suggested that we all go see some historical sites about 2 hours north of Cheyenne.

Caryl, Ed, and Dylan check out the officers’ quarters, known as “Old Bedlam.”

Our first stop on Monday was Fort Laramie, a fort held by the army in the mid-1800s and now mostly restored. The park’s employees dressed in period costumes and were very knowledgeable about the site’s history.

Mary with a sign at the trailhead.

We spent quite a bit of time at Fort Laramie. Then we piled back into the car and drove an additional 30 minutes eastward, just beyond the town of Guernsey, WY.

Mary and Ed stand in the wagon ruts.

Here we found 2 sites that are part of the history of the Mormon Church: the Guernsey Ruts and Register Cliff.

Dylan leaves the beaten path to explore the wildlife and risk jumping over ravines.

This area is part of the trail followed by the Mormon pioneers, along with several other groups, as they traveled to the West. The sandstone over which their wagons passed was so soft that their wooden wheels carved deep ruts into the stone, which remain there to this day.

Ed and Dylan at another section of the ruts.

Finally, we drove 2 more miles to Register Cliff, where the same pioneers paused in their travels to carve their names into the sandstone cliff alongside the trail. The names and dates on these cliffs have been authenticated as far back as 1797.

Historic names and dates carved into the rock alongside those carved later, from the 1960s to 2000s.

By the time we returned to Cheyenne, it was about 5:00 p.m. and we had one final, important stop to make to commemorate Memorial Day. We stopped by the cemetery to visit the graveside of Ed’s dad, who passed away last November.

Ed with his mom, Caryl, at his father’s graveside.

We ended the evening by going to dinner at Outback before driving Caryl back to her home. Before we returned to Cheyenne, Dylan (a Boy Scout First Class) assisted Ed (Assistant Scoutmaster) in properly retreating the colors from the pole in front of Caryl’s house.

Ed and Dylan take down the flag at the end of Memorial Day.

It turned out to be a beautiful day and a great opportunity to grow closer as a new family!

Alive and Well in Wyoming

Dylan and Mom just minutes before leaving home at 5:30 a.m.

We’re here! On Saturday, Dylan and I made the very long, 12-hour drive from our home in Arizona’s White Mountains to my husband Ed’s current home in Cheyenne, Wyoming.

Thankfully, it was an uneventful trip. No flat tires or engine trouble. No illness or accidents or bad weather. We met nothing worse than continual road repairs in both New Mexico and Colorado.

12-year-old Dylan dozes on the way to Wyoming.

Dylan actually slept most of the way, so he didn’t provide much company to help me stay alert. I got only 3-and-a-half hours of sleep the night before we left. It was kind of hard to sleep when I was so excited to be reunited with my new husband after 4 days apart! Remember, we’re still newlyweds!

Dylan at Wendy’s for lunch in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

Mary in Santa Fe, with mountains in the background.

We made just 3 stops along the way. We filled the tank in Gallup, New Mexico, before driving on to Santa Fe, where we stopped for gas and lunch. From there, we drove on to Pueblo, Colorado. We stopped there to gas up the car one last time.

Dylan cleans the windshield in Pueblo, Colorado.

In Pueblo, I also bought 2 dark chocolate bars, hoping the caffeine in them would help wake me up a little. I was more alert after that, but I’m not sure if that was due to the chocolate kick or if it was because I was now less than 3 hours from being in Ed’s embrace again!

Ed’s mom Caryl outside her house on Sunday morning.

Ed met us outside when we pulled up at his mom’s house in Carr, Colorado, at 6:30 p.m. (that’s Colorado/Wyoming time, which is currently an hour ahead of our Arizona time.) It was great to finally meet his mother, Caryl. She told me she’s been praying for years that Ed would meet someone who would make him happy. What a sweet lady to have for my new mother-in-law!

Ed’s nice, 2-bedroom apartment in Cheyenne (bottom right).

After a short visit, Ed jumped in the car with Dylan and me and drove us 30 minutes further north, across the state line, to his apartment in Cheyenne, Wyoming. As exhausted as I was, we still had a wonderful reunion. He surprised me with the beautiful flowers below.

Red roses and lilies from my sweetheart.

Sunday was a full day. We were up early to prepare for church, then we returned to Carr, CO, to pick up Ed’s mom before heading back to attend Ed’s ward in Cheyenne. It was the first of the 3 Sundays during which Dylan and I will attend the Frontier Ward. Everyone was friendly and anxious to meet Ed’s new wife. There were many surprised glances at the start of the meeting when the second counselor, Brother Micheli, announced the recent marriage of Ed and Mary Reynolds!

Arriving at the Frontier Ward meetinghouse.

That evening we attended an open house for a military family in Ed’s ward, who’ve been transferred to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Cayle and Trina are friends of Ed’s, and he hopes to visit them in their new home since he’ll soon be living with us in Lakeside, just 4 hours away from Albuquerque.

I can’t even express how happy I am to be here, back with my husband where I belong. I hope it’s a very long time before we have to be apart again!

Not Good-bye

Ed and Mary on the edge of the Mogollon Rim, 25 May 2010.

Yesterday was tough.  We'd only been married for four days--four blissfully wonderful days--when I had to drive Ed to Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix and watch him board a plane back to Cheyenne.

I know it's necessary for him to tie up his loose ends so he can get moved here permanently.  I know I'll see him in just 3 more days, when Dylan and I drive to Cheyenne to join Ed on Saturday.  I know we both have a lot of tasks to complete, so the time should pass quickly.  I know...well, I'm pretty sure I'll survive this short separation.  But I miss him horribly already, and the tears seem to spill too easily and frequently.

How is it possible to feel so happy and so sad at the same time?   

When Ed arrived, we chose the Salt River Canyon route to bring him to our mountain home.  Yesterday we took the Mogollon Rim route to leave our mountain.  I wanted to share all the amazing scenery of our area with him.

Before we started down the face of the Rim, we stopped at an overlook to enjoy the breathtaking view spread out before us.  Jacob came with us so I wouldn't have to make the 3-hour drive home alone after leaving the airport, so we gave him the job of taking these pictures.  The lighting wasn't perfect, but the memories are.

We arrived at the airport before 8:00 pm, so we had about half an hour to relax and say our farewells.  It was awfully hard.  Ed kept telling me we weren't saying good-bye, we were saying "I'll see you soon."  Maybe, but it still felt a lot like good-bye to me.

When Jacob took this picture, he said, "You look like you're in pain, Mom."  It's called heartache, Son.

Ed's flight to Denver left at 9:25.  It was after 2:00 a.m. in Cheyenne when he reached his home.  It was just after midnight in Arizona when Jacob and I got back here.  Despite the lateness, Ed and I still spoke on the phone for a very long time.  We spoke again this morning.

This separation will be over soon, but meanwhile it just doesn't feel right for us to be apart.  You're right, my love, this is not good-bye.  I'll see you soon.