A Mother's Day

I got to be with two of the three who call me "Mom" on Mothers Day.

May 12, 2019

Mothers Day is always special, thanks to the attention my children give to making it memorable for me every year. This year was no different. The only thing missing was my middle child, Jacob, who was busy in Mesa dealing with recent illness and injury of one of his dogs, Lucky. We missed having him here, but we did get to talk to him.

The day began early, when Mark woke me at 5:30 to take him to work. When I stumbled into the kitchen to put on slippers and a jacket (it's still in the 30s some mornings), I found he'd left a Mother's Day card and a ceramic angel on the table for me. We're not even married anymore, but he's still thoughtful about remembering these occasions.

An gift and card from Mark. A booklet and chocolate from church.

Then it was time to get ready for church. There are some who think that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is a patriarchy in which the men hold all the "power" simply because they're the ones who serve as priesthood leaders, but the reality is quite different. We actually believe that priesthood power is held by both men and women, endowed with the same rights and responsibilities, and this is obvious on Sundays. The bishoprics of our wards are indeed made up of three men, and it's the brethren who serve in the presidencies and as teachers of the Elders Quorum, Sunday School, and Young Men youth program. However, the women helm an equal (and in many ways greater) responsibility in the presidencies and as teachers of the Relief Society, Young Women youth program, and Primary. There are often one or two men who also teach the children in Primary, but the organization is predominantly made up of women, with only women called to serve in its presidency.

Thus, without the combined efforts of both the brethren and sisters, our Sunday meetings would cease to operate as efficiently as they do, and possibly even fail to serve their intended purposes.

Nonetheless, our bishop decided last year that the sisters should be served by the brethren on Mothers Day, and he actually assigned the men of our ward to cover all of the women's duties for the day. Then all the women met with the bishopric in the cultural hall, where they served us cheesecake and gave a presentation expressing appreciation for the many gifts women share with the world. (Note: not all wards do this. These types of activities are selected by each ward's bishop.)

It was an interesting experiment, but it went off pretty well. The teenage girls met with the boys' group and their leaders, while the children met in one large group rather than individual classes. Relief Society wasn't an issue, of course, since all the women were together in the hall, and even the nursery was manned by the men.

It worked so well, in fact, that our bishop decided to do it again this year. This time we were served huge slabs of delicious-looking chocolate cake (which Sarah and I did not eat). Instead of a presentation, the bishop opened the floor to an open discussion regarding the place of women in the Church. It was quite thought-provoking, with comments from ladies in all walks of life, from grandmothers, to mothers of young children, to single moms, to women who never married or had children. All expressed differing levels of struggles in their lives, and all expressed their faith in the power of Christ and His Atonement to help us endure in spite of our varied issues. It was very uplifting.

To prevent falling to temptation, I'd baked a sugar-free cheesecake the previous night and brought two slices to church in a small container so Sarah and I could indulge in something sweet while everyone else was enjoying cake. Our Relief Society president had mentioned to the bishop that there are people in the ward watching their sugar intake, so there was a bowl filled with delicious sugar-free chocolates, too!

Sarah made Mexican Chicken for my Mothers Day dinner!

While we were still in the hall at church, visiting and enjoying our sweet treats, Jacob called to wish me a happy Mothers Day, so I got to chat with him for a few minutes. He was at the veterinarian's office, waiting for the vet to come in and take out Lucky's stitches.

When church was over, I picked Mark up from work on the way home. Then I went into my office to work on a computer project I'd started the day before. There were some dishes stacked on the sink from the previous night's dinner, as well as some baking dishes from the cheesecake, but I planned to get those washed up when I finished the project.

When I finally went out to get started, I found the dishes all washed up and the kitchen all tidied up! I told Mark it was one of the best Mothers Day presents I'd ever received, and I meant it!

On top of that, Sarah announced she was bringing dinner so I wouldn't have to cook, and she asked what I'd like. I chose her Mexican chicken casserole. It's an old family recipe, which I'd tweaked to make low-carb, and then Sarah tweaked it again to suit her tastes. We all agree that her version is by far the best one!

Mary with her Mothers Day cards and gifts at the end of the evening.

Sarah and Chris came over a little before 5:00 so we could watch the next-to-last episode of American Idol together. We knew dinner was going to be late because Dylan didn't get off work until 7:30. Jake came over a little after 6:30, Sarah put the casserole in the oven just before 7:00, and Dylan arrived five minutes after leaving work. It all worked out perfectly!

After dinner, I opened my card and gift from Sarah and Chris. I keep telling my kids that I'd be totally happy with a simple card, expressing how wonderful and amazing they think I am (ahem), but Sarah always insists on getting me something. This year she got me three little glass planters with little succulents inside. So sweet!

Later, we called Jacob and enjoyed talking with him some more, together this time. The kids decided to rank themselves according to whom they felt were my "favorites." They all agreed that Sarah is my first favorite, Dylan comes in second, and Jacob takes last place. There was a lot of joking and laughter, and I teased them about how they could each rise in the rankings, but I hope they know I truly don't have a favorite.

As I explained to them, it's probably not accurate when a parent claims, "I love you all the same," because they are not the same. Each of my kids is an individual with differing strengths and weaknesses, which means the things I love and appreciate about them are different, but in no way any less powerful. We may relate to each other in varying ways, but each one touches my heart in a deeply personal way. Put simply, they are mine, each one, and to lose any one of them would be to break my heart. That's how a mother's love works.

I'm so blessed that each of you is mine, the three most beautiful gems in my jewel-box of motherhood!

The cheesecake that got us through the cake-temptation at church

was also our family dessert at the end of the night.