Zen Gardens

Remember when these mini zen gardens became all the rage for the desks of busy executives? They were supposed to help people find serenity during their crazy days.
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I didn't really get it. Big deal. As if that little square on your desk could make a real difference.

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Then, while doing summer cleaning, I suddenly realized that I've filled my home with many "zen gardens."

These are small areas of focus, places where I find my eyes wandering when I'm stressed. If life gets overwhelming, sometimes I'll sit in my favorite chair or lay on my bed, and my eyes will stray to this group of pictures or that shelf of mementos.

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It helps me regain perspective. It reminds me of what I hold dear and why I continue the struggle when all I really want to do is give up or run away from it all.

Each little oasis seems to have a theme, all of which are related.

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An image of the Mesa Temple--where I was endowed and served as an ordinance worker for 2 years (1983-1985)--hangs beside "The Family: A Proclamation to the World," issued by the First Presidency of our church in 1995.

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I'm reminded of the importance of my role as Mother and that I can be with my family in the eternities.

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Paintings of Jesus Christ on the wall beside my bed are a reminder of faith: faith in my Savior; faith in His power to redeem; faith that He loves us and is willing to forgive our sins and use our weaknesses to strengthen us.

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Perhaps most of all, faith that He suffered all for me and knows me personally, that He will comfort me and sit beside me in times of distress.

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My favorite scripture is on the living room wall:

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"Choose you this day whom ye will serve; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." (Joshua 24:15)
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My other serenity gardens, placed here and there throughout the house, feature Sarah, Jacob, and Dylan.

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Though they can be challenging and disruptive at times, my children represent my most important purpose in life. Every sorrow, every pain, every disappointment, every struggle is bearable because I would gladly walk through fire for them. They are worth it.

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I once read: "Choosing to having a child is choosing to have your heart walk around outside your body."

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I believe that is true!

On the desk in the above picture is a frame featuring my bronzed baby shoes and a picture of me when I was 2 years old.

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Sometimes I look at the picture above it, the one of 2-year-old Sarah and 4-month-old Jacob, and sometimes I think I see a hint of my features in Sarah's little face. Just a hint. She really looks like Mark's dad.

I suppose a little tray of clean sand to rake and smooth stones to arrange can be relaxing.

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If I had a zen garden with the sounds of waves on the shore, and the feel of a breeze in my hair, it could be a great way to step outside the hectic world and become renewed.

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But my little gardens remind me why I stay in this world. They bring eternal perspective back to my life.

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And I press forward for another day.